Friday, March 21, 2014

How I make $60 per day ($1800 per month) with Ojooo

1. After joining go to purchase upgrade and buy VIP ($99) OR premium+ ($39)
2. When you bought VIP go to purchase referrals ( every 3 days)
 3. Now you will have to buy 500 referrals every 3 days.
Inactive rented referrals will be replaced every 3 days for free!
You earn 6$ a day with 500 rented referrals. After 3 days you will have earned $18 so you will need to invest only $82 to get another 500 referrals.
$64 by the next investment and 46$ for reaching 2000 rented referrals.
When you reach 3000 rented referrals you will start to make a profit while you keep renting until you reach the 5000 rented referral cap.

If you would like to earn from Ojooo rented referrals but do not have enough cash available for a big investment, you can take a premium or premium+ account and you can upgrade to VIP later and still make a lot of money! 


4. Start promoting your referral link and make up to $399 per referral upgrade!
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Saturday, March 8, 2014

Ha! More proofand get you high, Grasshopper pens only get you high. Because why the hell would I want the option to record the administrative tasks of my day when I also have the option to ignore them in favor of sucking on a Bic-shaped vaporizer?
that if pens wish to avoid extinction they better start bringing more to the table than a barrel full of ink! In fact, Grasshopper makes the biggest leap of all--the one I've been waiting for: it eliminates the writing function altogether! Grasshopper pens don't make to-do lists
Like the VaporBLUNT, the Grasshopper is a completely portable, self-contained herbal vaporizer. However, instead of modeling itself after a chubby Crayola, Conrad Behrman, Matthew Most, and Trevor Vita have fashioned their durable and discreet inhalation station after a contemporary and elegant ball point. The basic model's exterior housing is made from smooth stainless steel (titanium and colored titanium upgrades are also available) carved to be durable and comfortable to hold and store, yet thin enough to maximize interior space for a larger battery and chamber.
To begin a Grasshopping experience, unscrew the pen's tip and load it with your herbs of choice. After reaffixing the chamber, click the end of the pen once to turn it on; a ring of red dotted lights will display. Seconds later, once Grasshopper has heated and is ready to puff, the red lights will turn blue. From there, lower mouth to metal and let the chillin', relaxin', Dominoes ordering (complete with special pizza cuts and box top drawing requests), and abstinence from writing begin.
Grasshopper endeavors to further differentiate itself from other portable vaporizers on the market with its heating technology. Direct Metal Laser Sintering, a type of metal 3D printing, allows for the construction of a compact heat exchanger with low flow resistance. The 30-watt heating element is also an upgrade in standard strength, and powerful enough to keep up even during aggressive use. To control temperature and monitor user input the vaporizer uses a pair of microprocessors to convey information from end to end. The result: no wires, a slimmer profile, and reduced manufacturing costs.
Grasshopper the vaporizing pen will be available for backing on Indiegogo through December 15, 2013. Anticipated delivery if the crowdfunding campaign is successful is February 2014. Right about the time I expect my next hankering to watch Grasshopper the Karate Kid to hit. I imagine the two will pair very well together.
Thanks to Wovenlore for the Dude Product Tip.
February 2014 Update: Grasshopper far achieved its funding goal (by 3-1/2 times), so its initial production run and delivery of backers' pens is still in the works. Follow the link below to the company's Website for further information and updates about future availability to the general public.
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Think about those nights you bolt upright in bed, heart racing, salty with cold sweat, awakened from a nightmare just before you meet your final doom. Now think about the rush of relief you feel as you take in the solitude of your cozy bedroom, the cushy support of your TempurPedic mattress, and the comfy envelopment of your goose down pillows. Lame, right? You don't want to feel peace, you want to feel fear. You want a perpetual battle for your life. You want a constant challenge to your sanity. You want an average resting heart rate of 120. You want to wake up from one nightmare and step right into the next! Zombie bedsheets will make it happen. With the desperate clutches of dozens of living dead hands creeping towards you amidst explosions of blood and brain matter, you'll never have to worry about sleeping in peace like some punk little baby who spits up and shits himself and has to suck on a boob 'cause he can't chew steak ever again.
Textile designer Melissa Christie's fantastically creepy zombie bedding set for real men and women includes a duvet cover and 2 pillowcases, with screen printed zombie arms, and masterfully hand painted blood splats and cranial extractions. Available in standard bedding sizes twin, double, queen, and king.
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Yes ma'am, my necktie is made of solid wood. And it just so happens it's pointing to something else that is made of solid wood, if you know what I mean. So why don't we--wait! Don't flip your hair and walk off in a huff! I was talking about I'm wearing wooden shoes! I am! Because I'm Dutch, from, OK then. I guess that's one pickup line Wood Thumb's wooden tie won't add to my repertoire. At least it's easier to wipe clean when an entire glass of wine is dumped on it though.
Wooden ties are upcycled accessories, chopped, drilled, sanded, and varnished from San Francisco salvage yard redwood beams. They measure approximately 20-1/2" long. Wood Thumb notes the pictured version, a wider tie, is best sported by someone 5'11" or taller. So there goes 80% of their market. Due to having come from real trees, each tie has slight variations in texture and pattern. Just like faces. Except unlike genetics, I think Wood Thumb makes sure none of their ties turn out ugly.
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When Zane Wylie was 5 his mom gave him a canister of Play-Doh and Zane Wylie ate it. When Zane Wylie was 8 his mom gave him a pack of colored pencils and a spiral sketch book and Zane Wylie traded the pencils for a couple Hot Wheels and used the book to smash ants and flies at recess. Then one Friday--the Friday after Thanksgiving when Zane Wylie was 12--Zane Wylie's mom was about to hack up a turkey carcass to make stock, and Zane Wylie was like, "Hey can I see that for a sec?" Reluctantly, his mom handed him the bones and a knife, which Zane Wylie used to carve the entire illustration of that kid's leg getting eaten by a boa constrictor in Where the Sidewalk Ends along the turkey's backbone. An artist was born.
The moral of the story: don't let your mom pigeon hole you with Play-Doh and paper products. Find a medium that speaks to you and turn it into art. (My mama would like to add this medium should preferably be one that earns enough money to get you your own place, or at least chip in on the groceries every once in a while.)
The medium that truly speaks to Zane Wylie, presumably not discovered until some years after his turkey awakening, isn't carcasses but skulls. Human skulls. Real ones. He carves them, intricately and elaborately, with themes ranging from Celtic warriors to Asian dragons to Russian sea captains. The skull featured above depicts the life of Vadim Konyashev, a salty child of the Laptev Sea who grew up on the bow of his father's ship. On the day his father died, Vadim took a bottle of vodka from the man's 3-fingered hand and realized he was raised with such crudeness and tyranny so that he would learn to be strong enough to carry the legacy of leader of men when this moment came. Wylie continues the story:
His father's blood, now starting to freeze to the outside of the bottle glistened as Vadim held it high and drank it empty. The crew's cheers were cut short as the empty bottle shattered against the forehead of a crew member. "Next man who thinks celebrating is more important that working eats this glass!"
Who knows if the tale of Vadim Konyashev is real or not--maybe it's total BS like my tale of Zane Wylie--but either way, the captain's immortalization as etchings on authentic dead head bones seems fitting. And pretty awesome.
All of Wylie's real human skull art is available for purchase through his Website below. He also sells carved replica skulls.
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Friday, March 7, 2014

What I like about this Kraken umbrella is the inside, which features a giant Kraken. What I like significantly less about this Kraken umbrella is the outside, which features a mess of curlicued, doily-looking sea life and free advertising for The Kraken spiced rum. I am ambivalent about the squid arm handle. It looks cool, but I'm skeptical of its gripping comfort, especially during a blustery downpour. I'm bitter enough when forced out of doors in inclement weather. I don't need a palm covered in cephalopod suction cup imprints adding to my ire. (Note: According to The Kraken Supply Shop, the Kraken umbrella's handle is "rubbery". How does one interpret that in terms of skin-gouging potential?)
So as not to sound like a complete d-bag, I will reiterate that I do dig the inside of the Kraken umbrella. And I generally enjoy umbrellas as a commodity. I will also disclose that I chipped a tooth biting into a Werther's Original a couple hours ago, so I'm not in the best of moods.
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The essence of Oscar Mayer bacon will strum at your nostril strings like no other." While the Oscar Mayer brand has never been my first choice at the pork candy store, it will definitely be my first choice at the scent-emitting alarm clock store. From forth the gustatory-meets-tech loins of a company we already know has a way with B-O-L-O-G-N-A comes Wake Up and Smell the Bacon, a smartphone attachment that wafts the stirring aroma of bacon at the sound of its compatible alarm clock app.
When weighed in tandem with the smoky, meaty smell of sizzling swine, Oscar Mayer believes the thought of getting out of bed won't just become tolerable, but preferable to hitting our snooze buttons. I have to say I concur.
At least until I realize the scent is a big hoax. That there is no actual bacon to be had! I bet I speak for many out there when I say bacon in my nose without bacon in my mouth at 6 a.m. is more than enough to rile the beast. Refrigerators could be ransacked. Frying pans could be flung. Neighbors' cats could be dropkicked. I wonder if the Wake Up and Smell the Bacon creators preparing to accept their Genius crowns have considered these possible repercussions of rousing bacon fiends with non-existent bacon. It's basically on the same level of meanness as selling oregano to hapless suits on the street who had a bad day and just want to relax with a 20 sack of weed. Except way less funny.
Still interested? At printing, the bacon scent-emitting device sought beta testers. To register, head over to Oscar Mayer's Wake Up and Smell the Bacon Website and fill out the online form, which requires the answer to questions such as, "Oscar Mayer bacon is brined, then cured for 12 hours. How long would you be willing to wait?" And, "In three words, describe your love for Oscar Mayer bacon." The most convincing applicants will be rewarded with the chance to get porked out of bed in the morning.
Or you could DIY yourself the scent and the succulence of bacon by converting your toaster oven into a bacon makin' alarm clock.
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Tuesday, February 4, 2014

Every groom-to-be gets cold feet at some point, and this zombie wedding cake topper brilliantly summarizes both the worst and best case scenarios that could play out when that happens. Worst Case Scenario: Your feet are so cold that you actually take off running, and your fianc�e must resort to physical force, and possible violence, to drag you back to the altar. Best Case Scenario: That fianc�e is also a zombie, so you don't have to feel too bad about killing her to get away.

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Nom, nom, nom. It's Hasenpfeffer meets the next-generation three wolf moon shirt. Your days of gnawing on leathery old rabbit parts that taste like a combination of barnyard and the positive ends of AA batteries are over. These fresh whole rabbits epitomize the concept of communing with nature, making man and beast one, and keeping Montezuma the F out of your GI tract. They're also the perfect gift for the abstaining vampire in your life. Please specify in Comments section of order form whether you would like a cottontail, lop-eared, angora, velveteen, or silly rabbit (infused with authentic Trix essences). Sorry, Jessica breeds are sold out through 2019.
 Rabbit meal..
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And you always thought she was an icy bitch because you couldn't get to second base. The Boob Luge puts a positive spin on the cold reality of interacting with women. Also, just like in the good ol' days of infancy, it allows thirsty boys (and girls, we guess) to lock lips with a nipple, and feel the nourishment flow. Only difference is, this ice cold rack's mammary duct work spurts out milk that's 80 proof.
Each boob has its own feeding funnel, so party goers can ride twin-style on the molded areolas of anatomical perfection. The luge measures 12" x 12" x 8", and holds about 9 litres

of water. Keep in mind, though, that the entire freezing process takes 48 hours, and plan your nipple-nuzzling accordingly.
Note to guys who don't have a mommy complex: we get that the thought of sucking liquid from a teat as a grown-ass man may not be DD-lightful. So we recommend taking a warmup shot or two from between the ice bust's breasts. You know, do something you're used to, and then ease yourself in to going full-on Oedipal.
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